Wednesday, 19 October 2016

October Catch Up - Deciding To Leave University


Last month I decided to officially leave university. When I say officially, I mean this time I have made a permanent decision. The decision to leave happened the first two days into the induction week. Yep, that's right, I never even made it to the second week! If you don't know already (briefly mentioned in an old post), I started university last year and did the exact same thing, except I had decided to transfer to another university. When I transferred to my new university I studied one semester, just before starting the new one I completely lost interest and enthusiasm for the course, so I dropped out and transferred to another course at the same university. It's all very muddled and all over the place! But that brings us back to last month when I had started university again in a new course at the same university just about to start the induction week.

I left the house the Monday of induction week in a terrible mood. I felt anxious and unhappy knowing that something just didn't feel right and that feeling just wouldn't budge for the whole day. The second day after enrolling with the university, I sat outside for lunch under a tree and starting to weigh out my options. I decided to think logically about the whole thing as well as paying more attention to what would be best for me. I always knew I never really wanted to go to university, it never appealed to me, but I felt like I had to go because that's where everyone else was going. When we were asked my most dreaded question 'what do you want to do when you leave school?', I never had a true answer, I was so indecisive about everything. I had no clue what I wanted to do for a career, I loved anything creative so when the time came to choose a university and course I decided to pick something that I thought I would enjoy.



That's when I look back and think how I could have just listened to myself in the beginning and decided not to go in the first place. But now I see it all in a different perspective, I think the experience I have had with the small amount of time that I was at university has given me more strength. It's given me the strength to listen to myself and make decisions much better than I used to.

I left university because I wanted to, not because I couldn't handle the work because I could, I just lost all interest. I feel like a weight has lifted of my shoulders now that I have left university, my anxiety didn't particularly help when I was there but I can now see a much better improvement. When I look at the whole experience I don't think it was a total waste of time, I think it gave me more of a chance to confirm officially whether it was right for me or not, I can at least say that I tried.


To anyone who is feeling the same about university, unsure about whether you should leave or if you're unsure if you even want to go in the first place. Don't ever feel like you are a failure just because you can't carry on with something that isn't right for you. You should feel proud of yourself for doing what you think is best for you, not shaming yourself or feeling like you're letting everyone else down. Because why do something that you're not passionate or enthusiastic about? Don't ever force yourself into doing something that you don't want to do. You want to be happy not pretend to be happy. Same rules apply to if you're in a job and you're starting to feel like something isn't right, so you start to think whether you should carry on or not, just always choose what is right for you.

Follow your heart, listen to your gut instinct. 'If you're not excited about it, it's not the right path.'

One of the biggest things I've learnt is to not keep all your worries to yourself, speak to a member of your family, your best friend or even someone who is within the university like a careers advisor or student advisor. Because someone will always be there to help you out, they can't be the one to make a decision for you but they can help you out if you need to know what options are available to you. It could be the course you want to change, transferring to a new university or finding out what happens next after withdrawing from university.

It's a difficult decision to make but this has definitely been my most important decision that I've made so far! For most people university can be the greatest experience for them! But it just wasn't for me. I'm much more happy and can now have the time to concentrate on my recent new job and think about where I can go from here. 'Some day we will find what we are looking for, or maybe we won't, maybe we will find something much greater than that'.

.....................................................................................................................

What's your university story?

Kayleigh

8 comments

  1. The best of luck to you with you decision, I know it will all turn out well for you! I am so happy I found your blog, I will definitely be reading it regularly now. Keep up the lovely work! x

    adelelydia.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tough decision to make but it's the best decision! Glad you enjoyed the post, thank you Adele! :)

      Kayleigh

      Delete
  2. Hi there Kayleigh!

    I'm happy to heard that you're better now! As you said, university is not for everyone.
    If you don't know what to do, I recommend you to take a gap year. I'm currently being an aupair in Dublin - so I can work, travel + discover new places at the same time. I have a whole new year to explore & to take time to think what I want do do later. & let me just say, everything is going amazing so far!

    Best of luck! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Lydia! I'm feeling much better! A gap year is a good idea for anyone who isn't sure about university :) Glad you enjoyed the post!

      Kayleigh

      Delete
  3. The way you wrote this was just - THANK-YOU. What i love is that you have completely owned the decision and recognise it's the right thing! I haven't officially left uni, but i had to suspend my studies for health reasons and will be doing my dissertation from home. So i haven't left my degree, but to all intents and purposes i've left Uni. I've been overanalysing and doubting this choice so much, but reading this has honestly helped me reflect better on it. THANK-YOU and wishing you all the best in the next step xxxx

    Bumble and Be

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, glad you found the post useful Sophie! It took me so long to write, I had so much to talk about and so much advice to give! It's amazing how one decision can make such a big difference. If I had to give one piece of advice to everyone it would be to always make decisions based on what's best for you and what will make you happy. I wish you all the best too! :)

      Kayleigh xx

      Delete
  4. amazing post,so inspiring and I agree 100% with everything you've said xo

    todaysouhaila.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, glad you liked the post :)

      Kayleigh x

      Delete

Latest Instagrams

© An Enthusiasm For. Design by Fearne.